Sudden

A few weeks ago my Dad and I were sitting in the infusion center on a hydration visit and a woman was set up next to him for a platelet transfusion. We got to chatting and found out her name was Cheryl and she too had a team for the Relay for Life last May. She was one of the most friendly, positive people I've ever met. She and all three of her sisters had faced cancer...and two had succumbed, one to colon cancer at a young age and one to breast cancer that came back all over her body on her 5-year remission anniversary. Her other sister was in remission after battling breast cancer. And Cheryl had stage 4 melanoma in practically all of her major organs, though you would never have guessed how sick she was from her spunk. She was planning to get into a clinical trial and was coming up on the year anniversary of her diagnosis. She and Dad hit it off and decided that next year they would co-chair the Survivors' Committee at the Relay.

Then last weekend we found a "mobile notary" in the neighborhood to come sign my car title; we got to talking and discovered that this woman is Cheryl's best friend! We were so excited about the discovery, and the notary gave Dad Cheryl's phone number and said when he was feeling better, he and Cheryl could take walks together. What a gift to encounter this beautiful soul yet again, albeit indirectly.

But alas, cancer is a bastard of a disease. Dad and I opened the paper Thursday morning to find Cheryl's picture staring out at us from the obituary section. How it happened we'll never know. We know she'd just had surgery, so something may have gone awry. But this is the first one of Dad's "cancer peers" to appear in the obituaries since this journey started. And it shook us all up. Cheryl seemed a lot less sick than my dad, and yet he's still here and actually hanging in there quite well.

Cancer doesn't play favorites, nor does it conform to expectations. It is not part of God's plan. It does not "happen for a reason."

And it sure as hell isn't fair.